Posts Tagged With: Grandmother

Beauty


Beauty is in the eye of the beholder the saying goes. So why not change what we behold?

Growing up, I looked at women with different eyes than the men I encountered. I was attracted to the kind words, the soft touch, the gentleness and love towards children and old ones, the way they were different than I was, the mystery, the way they saw what I couldn’t, the way they stood, they way they spoke, all the things that make a woman. I found those things beautiful.

I noticed, but never really dwelled on how small their waist was, if their butt wiggled when they walked, how thick their eye lashes were, what shape their eyebrows were, what style their hair was, if they wore nail polish, or makeup.

As I grew older, I fell into noticing these things, because for one, other men did, and for another, women would ask what I thought about it.

I have recently in the last few years began a reversion. Where I see the beauty I saw before, and couldn’t care less about the other.

A woman with a “plain” face uncovered by make up, is beautiful to me.

The wrinkles of a grandmother caused by laughter and worry are beautiful to me.

Jet black hair, red curly hair, blonde straight hair, black tight curls, are all beautiful to me, because they are who that woman is.

A woman who dresses to show off everything doesn’t appeal to me, but a woman who respects herself and her body is beauty beyond measure.

A woman with a newborn, glowing with the joy of creating a life, looking on her little one with love. There is nothing more beautiful.

What do your eyes behold?

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Happiness


What makes you happy? Seems like a simple question right? Yet so many are unhappy. Why do you think that is?

When I was younger, I tried to help people with what made them happy. Only to see them be happy for a short time, and revert back to the anger, sadness, depression, etc., that made me look closer at what happiness really is. In doing that, I looked at what brought that bright warm feeling into my heart and made it stay there, and tried to see that in others. Of course what made me happy didn’t apply across the board, but true happiness can be across the board in many ways.

I looked at how I felt when I bought something useful, when I bought an impulse buy, when a pretty girl flirted with me, when a good man saw good in me, when grandparents were proud of me, when I made something with my own two hands and skill, when I ate a food that tasted really good, when I drank pure water, when I sat and listened to the old ones telling stories.

I put all these together because as I understood when I was younger, they all caused happiness of some sort. What I realized as I grew up was some things fulfill a want, stroke your ego, play on an insecurity, these things do not bring happiness, but they do provide a strange form of release.

This release, in the feeling of it, is not unlike sexual climax for that alone, no good emotion associated with it. I chased after this for a few years, some of the darkest years of my life. I’ve been in extreme emotional pain, great physical pain, but that is a part of life, and not a darkness like you bring on yourself when you pursue the satisfaction of the moment.

I’m watching my newest niece sleep. I was trying my special uncle way to get her to burp earlier and was enjoying her smile, me making noises and watching her furrow her brow in concentration, then her little mouth moving trying to figure it out. She’s two months old, her little smile is happiness. It fills me up, and overflows, for lack of a better description.

This happiness is a gift. Nothing can replace the inner peace and utter joy a little one brings. When I was around grandmothers who were good women, there was another equal joy and peace they brought, the same with one of my grandfathers.

There are so many things in this life that bring happiness I have never experienced. But what I have experienced is that true happiness is given by others through our good actions towards them. True happiness also comes from us accepting the good things that come, like a newborn baby.

I would like to hear from others on what brings them true happiness. Even the smallest things like watching a hawk fly, or a rabbit eat a clover flower, or the way the sky changes colors as the sun rises and sets.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: